18 December 2006

"May it be to me as you have said."

Like many Christians at this time of year, I am doing my best to find stillness amidst the hustle & bustle of holiday activity, flashing lights, & Christmas parties. After all, our Savior arrived in a small & quiet way and the mad dashing from one store or party to another hardly seems to go with the silent night we are celebrating.

I've had some "forced" stillness in my life recently due to the mysterious stomach ailment I am dealing with. I see a specialist in a few weeks & previous tests have ruled a few things out, but for the most part, my symptoms are not a textbook case of anything. I know my faith is being built up because for the first time in my life when faced with a hardship, I am not asking "why me?" or demanding of the Lord that the pain be removed. I received an e-mail devotional from my aunt recently that reminded me that nothing happens to God's children that does not first pass through the filter of His love (thank you, Max Lucado, by way of "Aunt Bus"). I trust that implicitly. I trust that this serves some greater purpose of which I am currently clueless. I trust that God's glory will be revealed in &/or through my body, that I will learn many lessons, & that this will allow God's light to shine through me in a way it does not shine through anyone else.

I was reading through the first chapter of Luke for my quiet time one morning & was reflecting on how scary it must have been for Mary to receive the news that she, a virgin, would become pregnant by the Holy Spirit & give birth to the Messiah. It must have been just a tad overwhelming! While I believe that she heard & comprehended what she was told, there is also a part of me that knows she could not have fully known all that was meant by accepting the task of being Christ's mother. But she trusted God, telling the angel, "I am the Lord's servant. May it be to me as you have said" (Luke 1:38, NIV).

I have chosen to adopt Mary's words as my own during this season. I am no way comparing my stomach pain to bearing the Son of God; however, there is something to be said to be a young woman facing an unknown, trusting that though I cannot fully understand what is taking place, I place my faith in the One who does. Without God, the mystery of it all could be so confusing & frustrating as to cause despair. So I trust in the following:
  • God is present.
  • Nothing is happening to me that has not passed through the filter of His love.
  • He is not surprised by my pain & He is the only one who knows its root cause.
And I'm OK with all of that. In fact, I welcome it if it helps me fashion me into the person He designed me to be.

"May it be to me as you have said."


  1. Kirsten, that was a really good reminder. I think each of us has an area in which we need to say to God, "May it be to me as you have said."

    I will be praying for you. May God be glorified, whether through your healing or through your pain. But, I will pray it is through the former!

  2. Thanks to those who are praying!! I feel blessed by all the support I have while I'm dealing with this. :o)