personal penitence

This poem/prayer has grown out of a personal confession that has been evolving over the last several days. My heart has been heavy with many cares and frustrations which seemed to have clogged the communication lines between earth and Heaven, at least for me. For some time, it's been difficult for me to pray at all. And now in the wake of what has transpired in Haiti (in which unanticipated demands were placed on all our hearts), it seems fitting to share it now.

The form is loosely based on one of the forms of the Penitential Rite, which takes place at the beginning of the Catholic Mass. I'm becoming increasingly thankful for the liturgy, which gives me fitting words when I have none of my own.

I am lean on faith
and heavy with excuse.

Lord, have mercy.

I feel the pull and the tug
of gravity
and of anxiety.

Christ, have mercy.

My belly and my heart
are filled with sighs,
the exhalations of unmet hopes
and of many disappointments.

Lord, have mercy.

I have only enough care
to know I don't care enough.

Christ, have mercy.

My heels are dry and cracked,
my fingers bleeding.

Lord, have mercy.

Pierce my heart
with the nails of the cross,
with the thorns of your crown.

Christ, have mercy.

Let the hot blood course over
these frozen stones
and render them supple flesh.

Lord, have mercy.

Please hear my refrain,
carried on the breaths of the saints
and on angel wings.

Lord, have mercy.

Christ, have mercy.

Lord, have mercy.

photo by kirsten.michelle
copyright 2009