19 October 2010

Mourning & Motherhood


And poor C. quotes me, "Do not mourn like those that have no hope." It astonishes me, the way we are invited to apply to ourselves words so obviously addressed to our betters. What St. Paul says can comfort only those who love God better than the dead, and the dead better than themselves. If a mother is mourning not for what she has lost but for what her dead child has lost, it is a comfort to believe that the child has not lost the end for which it was created. And it is a comfort to believe that she herself, in losing her chief or only natural happiness, has not lost a greater thing, that she may still hope to "glorify God and enjoy Him forever." A comfort to the God-aimed, eternal spirit within her. But not to her motherhood. The specifically maternal happiness must be written off. Never, in any place or time, will she have her son on her knees, or bathe him, or tell him a story, or plan for his future, or see her grandchild.


C. S. Lewis, A Grief Observed

14 comments:

  1. C.S. Lewis put so many ideas into perspective that keeps with the rightness of the inspired scriptures. This passage brings to mind the grief that we felt when we lost a little one that we would never meet face to face. These are words I would have carried in my pocket and handed to people that said "helpful" things.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Too much for words in your comment box. Just love.

    ReplyDelete
  3. just love in this box as well.

    ReplyDelete
  4. feeling this so deeply with you in ways i could never convey so well

    ReplyDelete
  5. Dear Kirsten, I've been following your journey through this and reading your words. I've kept my words to myself because I just felt as if silence and prayer was fit. But I write to you now, to let you know that right after this comment I will be on my knees for you in prayer again, and I know that God is with you and will help you and your family heal. I myself have been going through rough times, and His word and promises are getting me through, as I cling to the cross. Through my trails I see how they are going to help me glorify God, because His strength is being made perfect in my weakness.

    Psalm 141
    "My eyes are fixed on you, O Sovereign Lord."

    I send my love to you dear lady.

    BIG HUGS ~

    ReplyDelete
  6. I'm so sorry, my friend. This quote, knowing it's reality in your actual life, breaks my heart for you. I love you.

    ReplyDelete
  7. I wondered if you knew this book. If you were reading it. Lewis' words are often such a comfort, in their unvarnished honesty.

    Joining others here to wish you love and comfort on this day.

    ReplyDelete
  8. on my knees for you in Connecticut.

    ReplyDelete
  9. All I can say is praying for you and you are in my heart!

    ReplyDelete
  10. heartbroken for you. i lost my four week old daughter in Oct. of 2008. You are in my prayers. I am so, so sorry

    ReplyDelete
  11. sweetie, I don't know you... I'm not even sure how I stumbled across Ewan's amazing story, and then I saw your photos... ever since, I haven't been able to get you out of my heart.
    For some reason I've connected deeply with your pain, and I've been whispering prayers for you whenever you cross my mind.
    May our God of all Comfort hold you close. I pray you'll find serenity and healing. And I thank you for sharing Ewan's story with all of us. He is loved.
    ~Susan

    ReplyDelete