Color Me Incredulous

An article published yesterday by Reuters indicates that 13% of Americans have never "heard or read anything about global warming". That is somewhat alarming, considering the press the issue has gotten in the past year.

Read the full text of the article here:
Survey shows 13 pct of Americans never heard of global warming

Here is another interesting one (added 31 Jan 2007):
Scientists Criticize White House Stance on Climate Change Findings

Passion, Purpose, & Calling

Leap, and the net will appear.
Zen Saying

The glory of God is man fully alive.
St. Ireneaus

Have you ever heard the voice of God & knew without a doubt that it was Him speaking to you?

There have been few times in my life where that has been the case, but I know beyond a doubt that it’s happening now. A friend noted the other day that I am more driven now than she has ever seen in the years she’s known me. A co-worker described me as “tenacious” just last week. The Lord is moving in my life in a mighty way. It is both exhilarating and frightening.

I realize now that I have known since I was a child what I was called to do & who God had called me to be. I have taken a few detours along the way (I like to think of it as the “scenic route”) and simply thought “God must be crazy”, trying to resist His pull and stay where I thought it was safe and secure. “Not me, Lord. Are you sure?”

I am meant to be a writer. He has also wired me to step out as a leader. The possibility of what this combination could mean is overwhelming until I remember God is behind it.

Scary? YES!! If you know me & find this surprising, you’re probably not the only one. On the other hand, I may not have been masking any of this as well as I thought!

Sometimes I think He must be crazy. After all, He trusts us to represent Him here on earth and He uses us, imperfect as we are, to be His hands and feet in a lost and broken world. But God’s wisdom exceeds our own. What seems perfectly insane to us could very well be the wisdom of God in action.

His word to me has come through clearly in sermons, in a class a church, through my boyfriend, family members, & His voice has resonated loudly in my own consciousness. He’s calling me out of hiding, urging me toward that for which He formed me. I can no longer hide behind cubicle walls or pretend to lose myself in Excel spreadsheets. The detours are over.

The written word has been my primary passion since I was a young child. My mom recently uncovered stories written when I was five or six years old, penned in green marker or scribbled in crayon. One was about a magical “fireplace fairy” and the other a dramatic retelling of the holy family’s flight to Egypt (“let me tell you, it is a VERY scarey story”). Throughout my elementary and middle school years, I would write more such stories for fun. In high school and college, I grew to love essay writing and poetry; I loved doing research on topics I cared about; I loved forming theses and proving my point. Never do I feel more alive and in the right place than when I can express my thoughts in written form.

At church, I am taking a class called Outfitters. It is a course designed to help people hone in on their personality, passions, talents, & God-given gifts in order to find their fits both in ministry and career. I’ve been learning in this class that our gifts are not in perfect form. For example, we are born with our muscles, but training is required to develop them to their optimum strength. Our gifts, the instructor says, are the same way. That was a light bulb moment and a burden lifted: you mean I’m allowed to perfect my gift? I’m not expected to be perfect at it the first time I try? I shouldn’t be discouraged when I am rejected or fall flat on my face?

To hear someone else say it, it seems so terribly obvious that I wonder how I missed it before. With the burden of perfection lifted, I know exactly what I need to do. I need to go into training. I have decided 2007 will be all about getting my feet wet & getting some good practice in. Read, write, & join a local writer’s group. They’re everywhere around here, all ages and levels of experience.

Another aspect of this class is discovering personality type. On the MBTI scale, I’m an ENTJ (I’m actually low on the E scale; I’m as close as you can get to the middle of the E/I scale without actually being in the middle. The instructor said it is likely I may also display INTJ tendencies. The E/I part may be borderline, but the "NTJ" part is solid). My personality type is specifically geared toward leadership. This personality type makes up a scant 1-3 % of the global population, with women making up the minority of this 1-3%.

My instructor says that the church often misunderstands women with this personality type since ENTJs are abstract thinkers, tend to process information with logic rather than feeling, & also are decisive, structured people. These are typically seen as “masculine” traits. This explains so much: why leadership in my previous church told my Dad I needed to be better controlled (after I wrote a letter to the board regarding some dishonest practices on part of the leadership), & why at times I felt so completely out of place as a woman at Biola, being told by a very few (but memorable) individuals that I needed to be “more feminine”. I wondered at times, what is wrong with me?

I was skeptical, questioning if I was truly expressing my God-given personality or if I was being rebellious & sinful. Now I can say with certainty that though not a “typical” female personality, this is really how I’m wired. I cannot try to bend myself into a mold I was not meant to fill.

Trusting the Lord’s leading, I picked up the phone late last week and ordered a customized laptop, printer/scanner, and digital camera. I was fortunate enough to get a substantial discount on the cost through an employee purchase program through work. I knew my dinosaur of a laptop (purchased in 1997) was going to need to be replaced if I am going to accomplish what the Lord is asking of me. As such, I trust that despite my major-purchase anxiety, this is a decision that is blessed by the Lord & one that was made at His prompting. I am thankful He has provided the means for me to acquire the tools I will need on this new adventure.

Though some things are changing, I’m learning I haven’t really changed at all. God is peeling back layers of a false self I had draped over myself so convincingly that even I thought this is just the way it is, this is who I am.

It is freeing & energizing to begin to realize my true self. I know there is a lot of work to do in terms of acquiring training & practice. I know I can expect a variety of challenges & obstacles. On the other hand, I also know that if this is who God made me to be, pursuing this will be the most natural thing in the world and the work I put into it will give energy back to me instead of taking it away (as sitting in a cubicle processing refunds does). I can be tenacious & I can be driven where my passion is concerned.

But OY … here is the rub: it will be a couple years before I can abandon the “good” job that is ultimately the one of the worst possible fits for me (in terms of a career satisfaction). It is a temptation to do what I really love instead of doing the job I am paid to do, so I will need to be leaning on the Lord & trusting Him to help me remain responsible and committed to the work He has me doing for the time being.

That being said … HERE WE GO!

Cars on Ice: UPDATE

I received a call from the adjuster from my insurance company today; the driver of the car I hit is claiming to have sustained injuries (see the previous post for details). The impression I received is that this person is trying to take advantage of the situation to get some money. The adjuster said it is highly unlikely that the woman sustained the injuries she's claiming if there is no discernible damage to my car.

I take my car in on February 6 to get inspected so it can be verified that there is no damage to my vehicle. My Dad, the most detail-oriented man on the planet when it comes to motor vehicles, couldn't even detect a scratch on my car after it happened, so I am not afraid of them finding anything we haven't seen already.

Even though I know I've done everything I could possibly do to handle this correctly, I am still pretty discouraged. I am extremely sleep-deprived today, having slept less than 2 hours of last night, I have had a demanding work day, and continuing to deal with my stomach issues - I just feel like crawling into a hole and hiding until this all blows over.

If you think of it, I would appreciate your prayers in this matter. Several things have happened lately that make me feel like I have a target painted on my back. I know it is the evil one trying to discourage me, but I don't want to give in to his attacks.

Thank you, friends!

Care & Maintenance of the Curly Coiffure

Over the years I (like many of my curly-haired friends) have been stopped & complimented on my hair. "Yes, it's naturally curly." I always thank them for the compliment and if asked, refer them to Lori, the woman who (I am convinced) is the best hair therapist this side of the Atlantic Ocean.

I certainly cannot take credit for the hair being curly; that was God's doing. When I was being formed in the womb, He spliced genes together in the perfect marriage of DNA between my parents and voila! Kirsten is born with curly locks.

The only thing I can reasonably take credit for is the maintenance of my mane, which is an ongoing experiment in the right combination and balance of products used at the appropriate time (as almost anyone with curly hair will tell you). It is a common occurrence to stop or be stopped by another curly-haired woman in the restroom & to hear the question, “what do you use?” We are always on the quest not only for the perfect products, but the perfect combination of products. A discussion of the four or five indispensable gels, mousses, creams, and sprays & their proper applications can have two curly-haired strangers locked in conversation for considerable amounts of time.

The ironic thing about having naturally curly hair is that the process of making it look like something other than an SOS pad struck by lightning is one that is anything but "natural". Honestly, I am not complaining. I love having curly hair! It's just that those who think they want it cannot know the time one must invest to keep it in good shape. The morning regimen varies from head to head, but the common thread is time & multiple products. Lest anyone be covetous of a curly-haired mop, here is my typical morning hair regimen:

Every 2-3 days:

1. Shampoo hair (this is done every 2-3 days to prevent the hair from drying out)
   

Every day:

1. After hair is wet (& shampoo rinsed out), brush through intensive conditioner.
2. Rinse.
3. Once out of the shower, wrap towel around the head in an attractive turban.
4. After 5-7 minutes (I am putting on makeup during this time), remove the turban.
5. Apply flexible hold/anti-frizz gel throughout hair.
6. Flip head upside down and shake out curls with fingers.
7. Apply curl-enhancing mousse throughout hair.
8. Flip head right-side up. Don’t touch the curls!
9. In about 2-4 minutes (after finishing final makeup touchups), blow-dry with a diffuser (this takes about 5-6 minutes).
10. Apply finishing crème (a light conditioning crème that helps tame frizz created by blow-drying and other environmental stressors).
11. Finish with flexible-hold hairspray & more finishing crème as needed.

Sadly, following the same routine daily does not guarantee that my hair behaves or looks the same, nor does it mean it won’t turn into a poofball rivaling a lion's mane the instant it comes in contact with the moisture in the air that is ubiquitous to the Pacific Northwest. Nevertheless, in an effort not to look like the offspring of Medusa, I follow & modify the routine & hope for the best.

Can I get an "AMEN" from the curly-haired girls?

Save the World for $10

First of all, I must give credit where credit is due. I found this resource through my sister Kaari's Blog.

Malaria is running rampant in parts of Africa. Why does this matter? Why should we care? Please read the following excerpt from a recent Time Magazine article:

Another African child has died of malaria since you started reading this article. Perhaps 2 million children in all will succumb this year.

The long-term consequences are insidious as well as tragic and even relate to the ability of the U.S.to prevail against the jihadists. Not only does malaria sap worker productivity and scare away business investment, but it also, paradoxically, increases the rate of population growth. Instead of having two or three children, couples in a malarial region often choose to have six or seven--unsure how many will survive. ...

Osama bin Laden has called for jihad in Africa, trying to capitalize on its extreme poverty. Here's how we can respond. While malaria has shaped Africa's poverty trap, it is a trap that can finally be unlocked. Spectacular technological advances, some stunningly simple, offer practical and low-cost solutions. The most obvious one is insecticide-treated bed nets, now cleverly engineered to last up to five years. The cost to manufacture, ship and distribute each net is $10. A new generation of medicines based on artemisinin, an extract from a traditional Chinese herbal remedy, is remarkably effective in treating cases of the disease, at a cost of about a dollar per treatment.

You can check out the article in its entirety from Time Magazine, The $10 Solution. A donation of $10 can make the difference between life & death for family in desperate need.

Aslan is on the Move

In C. S. Lewis's The Lion, The Witch, & the Wardrobe the White Witch's power over Narnia manifested itself in making it "always winter, and never Christmas". Snow melted away and gave in to spring when Aslan was on the prowl, allowing trees to bud and the ground to become malleable once again.

It may not be time for spring yet, but Aslan is on the move in Bellingham. There is no snow in sight and to that I say, HALLELUJAH! I've never been so happy to see the rain.

Today's Weather:

Cars on Ice

All the snow & ice that's been hanging around finally reared its ugly head at me yesterday. In my 13 years of driving, I've driven in snowy & icy conditions enough to know how to handle myself, my car, & to know when conditions warrant locking the door and staying at home. In this storm we've been fortunate in that the main roads have been kept clear & dry (for the most part), making driving far less treacherous than the winter storm we had in November.

Yesterday, I went to renew my driver's license (my birthday is on Tuesday - yikes!) and after I was done, decided I wanted to stop at Starbucks to get a latte. I pulled slowly into left hand turn lane & gently applied my brakes. Time slowed down, the wheels stopped turning, but my car did not stop moving. I collided into the car in front me, causing that car to bump into the car in front of it. In the years I've been a licensed driver, this is the first time I've been the one behind the wheel in an auto accident.

While the experience fell something short of pleasant, I felt fortunate in that damage was so minimal to the other car that the police said it did not warrant an accident report. No one was injured. There was no discernible damage to my own car. The others who were involved in this with me were gracious, understanding it was not negligence on my part, but the slippery ice that was the primary culprit in the collision. I was not given a ticket. The representatives I spoke with at my insurance company were not just civil, but even pleasant to deal with.

Given the circumstances, I believe it is the best I could hope for. For someone with perfectionistic tendencies however, it came as a blow. But God is good. I am continually amazed how & when He chooses to reveal Himself, turning even a "bad day" into a blessing. Mom & Dad came to the rescue, bringing my currently carless boyfriend to me. I was surrounded by people who love me & was reminded of how fortunate I am to have them in my life & to realize (as cheesy as it may sound) that it really will all be okay.

Postponed

Due to the inclement weather we’ve had here recently, my appointment with the gastroenterologist on January 11 was canceled. The office called me today to reschedule.

My new appointment is on February 20. Those of you who have been reading my blog for awhile know I have been dealing with this ailment on & off since May/June of 2006 (my first symptoms popped up 3 1/2 years ago). It was at the beginning of November 2006 that my symptoms became too severe to ignore & were not responding to any of the medication I was taking. My January 11 appointment was scheduled shortly after Thanksgiving. I must now wait another five and a half weeks before I can get in.

I understand that the severe weather was beyond anyone’s control. I recognize that I am not the only patient this has impinged upon, & I’m reasonably certain that I am not the only one who is unhappy about it.

I’m doing my best to trust God in this, to say “ may it be as You have said”, but the news is still fresh & I feel like this is a tremendous setback. Simply put, I am worn out with being sick, weary of waiting, and drained by the unpredictable & varying symptoms I’m experiencing.

As the news settles in, it is my prayer that I will trust God’s hand in all of this & trust that there is a bigger picture I am simply too shortsighted to see. I pray that this may be a "when I am weak, then He is strong" experience.

I am not there yet, but by His grace, I will be soon.

Snow Pics

Here are some pics from yesterday, all taken right outside my apartment. It was a nice, clear day & a balmy 4 degrees with the windchill. Today it's a heatwave @ 14 degrees. Woo hoo! We're warming up ...

Snowy Day

I do believe I may have to rename my blog to "lattes & snowy days". Yesterday & today mark the fourth winter storm Western Washington has seen in just over a month. Mostly it has been high winds (gusts up to 65 mph yesterday) & plenty of rain. Get some nice soaked soil & add some high winds, you've got the perfect recipe for falling trees, which often result in massive power outages. In all fairness however, I cannot complain about views like the one at the left.

I am sure this is nothing like what our friends in Colorado are experiencing. But for Washingtonians who were expecting a "mild" winter, we are certainly getting our fair share of newsworthy weather.

Here is what I'm in for today:

Weather for Bellingham, WA

2 Days & Counting ...

Just two more days until I see the gastroenterologist! I never thought "excited" would be an adjective I'd use to describe my feelings about going to the doctor, but that is the case today. Though I'm sure I'll have to wait for additional testing before I know anything concrete, it will be nice to get the ball rolling.

Good Movies

When it's cold outside & I'm just not feeling like reading a book, I like to find good movies that are slightly off the beaten path. You probably didn't see either of these advertised at a major theater near you (they played at our little independent theater here in Bellingham), but these little sleepers ended up being pretty big hits. Both are available on DVD & are more than worth the rental fee.

These made me laugh out loud & reach for a tissue; I can't wait to add them to my own collection. If you haven’t seen either of these yet, I highly recommend them!

Little Miss Sunshine

This movie stars Abigail Breslin as a little girl with hopes of winning the Little Miss Sunshine contest. Her quirky family is supportive, but can’t seem to get through a day without some kind of mishap. Her father (Greg Kinnear) is a failure as a motivational speaker with his “9 Steps” to being a winner. Mom (Toni Collette) is doing her best to support her family & hold everything together. Olive’s uncle Frank (Steve Carrell) is a renowned Proust scholar who has attempted suicide after falling in love with a male graduate student who falls in love with one of Frank’s colleagues. The older brother Dwayne is a Nietzsche fanatic who swears he hates his family & has taken a vow of silence until he can be accepted into a pilot training program. And let’s not forget Olive’s drug-addicted grandfather who despite his “bad ass” behavior, is committed to coaching Olive in her talent routine for the contest. Circumstances conspire to get the whole lot of them on the road together with the ultimate end of getting Olive to the Little Miss Sunshine contest in California.
Check out the movie at Amazon.com

Kinky Boots

Charles Price grew up with his father in the family shoe business & had no plans of ever taking it over. Yet when his father dies, he learns that Price & Sons Shoes is deteriorating. Desperate to save the business (& the jobs of those who work there), Charles meets a drag queen cabaret singer named Lola. After hearing her complaints of the inadequate footwear for those in her line of work, she & Lauren (an employee of Price & Sons) suggest changing their typical product (high quality, but run-of-the-mill men’s shoes) & instead produce footwear for drag queens & transsexuals. Everyone deals with the skepticism of the employees, Lola’s discomfort in the factory’s very straight-laced small town, & Charles’ manipulating fiancée toward the greater good of Charles' dream to save his father's shoe factory.
Check out the movie at Amazon.com

Cat Nap

Anyone who has spent time with me in recent years knows that there are two things I absolutely cannot do:

1. Sit still when there is anything that can be or should be cleaned in my apartment.


2. Stay awake while watching a movie at home.

I spent some time at my parents' home yesterday & while doing laundry, I went to my sister's room to watch a movie. I wasn't particularly tired, but as the cliche goes, "old habits die hard".

My sister snapped this photo with her camera phone while the cat & I took an afternoon siesta on her bed.

Debt Free! ... well, sort of

My VISA is officially paid off!! I cannot tell you what an enormous relief it is to see this at a zero balance. I’m still repaying my student loans from college of course, but to have the worst kind of debt eliminated from my life makes me feel tremendously happy.